The Dead Parrot Inn

[Star_Traveler]

The fuzzy blob peeks out from under the junkbox and spies the knocked out demon cat. Slowly the fuzzy blob scampers over and hugs up to Squee and falls fast asleep, purring.

“Tomorrow it is then! I’m quite hungry. Where’s that cook?” Remington looks around and while IT buzzes around the junkbox and records its finding of a cold draft that’s flowing from underneath the musical machine, Remington walks up, drops a few coins into it and randomly pushes 221B. The machine whirls and clinks and churns and sounds as if it’s going to break but after a moment, music starts to play, filling the room. Remington wonders what song is playing.

[DivenWest]

Sparks sighed, he was about to pet... the cat thingey. He glanced at his watch and whistled. "Well, its been nice talking to ya, I have a delivery to make. Say babe, your place is on the way, want a ride?" he asked.

[Rotzi]

"Thanks but no thanks, Sparky. I'm less than a five minute walk from the shop." She looked over a Squee. "Y' heard him."

The cat smiled maliciously. "Oh yea... called her babe again... mwahaha!" Squee readied himself for the pounce. "Any last words, morsel?"

[Star_Traveler]

IT disappears behind the jukebox and at that moment the fuzzy blob scurries from beneath a rug (How did it get there!) and makes a mad dash towards the jukebox on a trajectory which carries it beneath the orange demon cat legs.

[Rotzi]

Right before Squee could pounce on the human sized morsel known as Sparks, the blob had passed under him. "ACK!" He went head-first into the carpet.
"Why that li'l..." growled the cat. He turned his attentions to the moving mass.

Jessi face palmed. "So much for that plan of attack." She looked back up at Sparks. "Just do me a favor, if ya see any goblins around my shop, kill 'em."

[Star_Traveler]

The lights of jukebox flickered off and a faint smell of ozone filled the air as the music abruptly stopped in mid note. A hush fell over the Inn as all eyes turned towards the, now dead, parrot shaped juke box. The deep sound started almost subliminal tickle of impending dread, a scrapping, a slithering at the very edges of your mind. The sound intensified as if a large granite tomb was opening revealing that which should not be. The sound unexpectedly stopped to be replaced with the cracking of wood, floor boards to be precise. The entire parrot shaped juke box, fell through the floor with a ear piercing scream and billows of dust filled the Inn with choking airborne debris, leaving a gapping black maw full of splinted wooden teeth protecting a hungry abyss.

[NaughtyOtsel]

The beefolk diner waitress slowly looked up to the sight of her jukebox which was now a smoldering heap.

"Who broke my jukebox eh?" Earlier she'd been reading some old ten cent pulp novel which she had propped up behind the bar while cleaning up some glasses; she really wasn't paying attention. Her wings buzzed in annoyance and the aqua, bright pink, and white crystals around her head started to spin faster.

Malachi caughed nervously and floated over to the stage in the corner. A few other business folks had started to come in to sit at tables near the wall, order coffee, and gossip. There were four women who had a rather bizzare likeness to the chicks from Sex in the City

"Somebody's got some explain'n to do..."

[Rotzi]

Squee growled. "It was that annoyin' li'l blob.. and that... thang." He shook himself off. "When I get my hands on that thing I'm gonna--"
"SQUEE! You watch that bloody mouth of yours."
"But it ain't bloody...."
"No buts. You definately ARE staying out of my room t'night."

"Oh yea, Miss Melissa, sorry about the juke box." Rotzi jabbed a thumb at the professor. "The li'l thing he called IT and some fuzzy blob thing did it. Who owns the inn, anyway?"

[Star_Traveler]

Professor Remington says, “So! That’s how one gets services in here!” and walks over to where the jukebox was. He mumbles, “Something very odd is going on here.” He peers closer. “I don’t think the jukebox is broken. I think the bloody thing has fallen through the floor.” Remington points to the gapping hole in the floor.

“SHHHH! I hear something!”

The jukebox was in fact not broken but at that very moment playing as if from a long ways away. Music notes drifted up from the black abyss. One could barely make out the words to the song, “Once in the time of chaos, of sunless days and of unhappiness."

"Now the Victory is ours!", “Misfortune and Chaos, Grief and Destruction.”

Remington asks, “What is that song? I’ve heard it before.”
The song continued, “"Hahahahaa!!!. Let us joy. Let us dance!!!" So they danced their macabre dances”

Remington gave an ‘AH HA look’ and said, “I got it!”

Another sound started to mix with the song a kind of thump, thump, thump sound

The song continued, “From the three ascending moons, moonshine was spilling onto the ground, Gruesome trophies were all around”

The thumping sound grew louder almost as if it was an army marching.

Remington, “Oh no! OH BLOODY HELL!” Remington stumbles back away from the pit.

The song continued, “In the halls of the Goblin King.”

And at the moment a dozen or more goblins, with blood red eyes, come pouring out of the black pit waving their spears.

[TheSalmonWhisperer]

(Sorry my post is late, I've been on vacation for the past two weeks ^^; )
Leanon, having remained quiet throughout the proceedings suddenly leapt to her feet, the floating and startled salmon in tow.
"It's fine! I think..I think I might just be able to handle the little buggers!"
She searched inside her robes, after much frantic scrabbling she pulled out a violin so old it looked almost ghostly.
Just as she had palced the bow on the delicate strings and had the charging spell aimed directly at the goblins, the salmon choose that exact moment to hover into her line of sight, causing Leanon to turn sharply and her spell to bound off each and every wall skimming the heads of all in the vicinity.
".......Ah...."

[Star_Traveler]

The misfire spell had a number of interesting effects… as the spell ricocheted off each person’s head, a pointy hat with a picture of a salmon appeared on that head (including the goblins who were not amused), in each person’s mouth a funny Feather Salmon Blowouts appeared and would make this blu blu blu sound when you exhaled, hundreds of assorted colored salmon shaped balloons start falling from the ceiling and the junk box’s music change to a song by Tom Green.

Tiny salmon swimming in a stream.
Tiny salmon chasing that impossible dream
The minor bird says ahh a ahhhh
The chimpanze says eiii eii eiiii eiiiii
The friendly owl says whoooo who whoooo
But the salmon can only say blu blu blu blu blu and its sad...

(Unknown to the people in the Inn, deep in the hole, the dead parrot junk-box had been transformed into the form of a large pink salmon junk-box)

A quite large cake appeared in the middle of the room, with pink salmon icing, and little salmon shaped sprinkles, fortunately this was on top of five of the goblins.

[TheSalmonWhisperer]

At the very sound of Tom Greens voice a sudden change came over Leanon's features, her usual mona Lisa smile was replaced by a large, chesire cat sized grin, she let out a small giggle of glee and swayed slightly.
"Ah, methinks the salmon have saved the day again!"
Sir Salmon kins blubbed and bobbed in complete agreement, only to be smacked on the head with Leanons ancient bow.
Blubbing slightly the confused salmon made it's way over to the cake, fins waggling joyfully.

[Star_Traveler]

Eight more goblins climb out of the hole and rush the crowd.

A deep rubbing sound comes from within the cake… and out pops… Out pops… OMG!!! NOOOOOO!!!! FOR LOVE OF HUMINITY!!! NOOOO!!!
A striper ORC!!! And all he’s wearing is 1950’s poodle skirt! NO!!! Wait it’s not a poodle skirt, it’s a Salmon Skirt! And he’s quite mad and wielding a mace.

[Rotzi]

Squee blinked. What in all the bloody elfhames...? As he watched the goblins rush by, he smirked and pounced one of them. Time for dessert! thought the demon cat, a malicious grin on his face.

Jessi sighed. How many times a month is something like this gonna happen. I swear, those goblins are like rats... or pigeons. Something like that....

[TheSalmonWhisperer]

Leanon stared at the orcs skirt with a look of complete adoration.
"I must have that skirt.....Leap, Leanon, leap!" she thought to herself, and she did just that.
She crouched down and attempted to leap gracefully into the air, unfortunatly she had never attended ballet lessons and fell head over heels, crashing straight into a very hungry Squee.